Okay, yesterday all of you went all ninja on MM, I’m still reading your comments. So I’ll lump today’s post (s) into one mess … sawa?
All tree huggers need to go and picket at The Standard group’s Head Office. These folks are wasting our forests! Hear me out; they’re introducing FIVE new pull outs to the paper, as if the paper isn’t a mess as it is. I highly suspect someone at the paper has a butchery somewhere, that’s a lot of nyama one paper can wrap when the pull outs come in.
Pull outs in this market are an utter mess; even the ones in the Nation are useless. Same recycled shit (The Saturday Nation takes the cake with recycled relationship pieces). A pull out is supposed to be COMPLETELY different from the rest of the paper, but all we have here are half baked stories largely borrowed from the internet.
The Standard also has a new weekly, the county weekly or whatever they’re calling it. I bought the first one yaani, I should have used that 40 bob to eat muturas! That paper is such a weak ass strategy. Another knee jerk reaction by the group
To the juicy stuff!!!!! On Saturday last week the standard pull out had a story about a device ladies have to pull out of themselves. THE DILDO!!! Yes, we understand the paper likes to fuck itself, but sharing their tool of choice with the rest of us???? You might argue that they were just informing, but then again, look at the target audience; can this paper ever come back and preach morals to girls ever again??? Their target audience is usually old and uptight, the kind that doesn’t even ‘weka kwa mudomo’ and they’re the ones you’re informing about dildos??? Fucking fail!
THEN!!! Caroline Mutoko defended the lady who wrote the dildo story and she brought the whole ‘I’m female and I can do me whenever I want’ okay, I clearly missed the boat, but ladies … what happened to being graceful and ‘well mannered’ what happened to be a ‘lady on the streets, a freak in the sheets?’ I mean once you announce, I used dildos, you should simply start buying cats, ‘cause utazeeka peke yako. No man wants to touch a woman who uses dildos. Those things are like 8, 9 inches and the average man has a 5 inch peanus. Plus the device is battery powered, HOW WILL YOU EVER BE SATISFIED BY A MAN?!!! Then you complain ati no man wants you … dump the dildos gurls!!! Oh by the way, you can’t preach about morality and then pull a Galis on your audience … stick to one side of the fence, wacha ugeugeu
Onto other things, Ciku Muiruri’s busted … I laughed when I saw Karucy talk about the guys that call in like they’re real. Honey, most of the calls are FAKE! Last year, she had the FAMOUS ‘Busted’ call, the call got heavy rotation on Classic and this week she called ‘Agnes’ back.
We all know that Ciku had hired a radio consultant to sort out her very kawaida show. The consultant suggested she hires voice artists to ‘play’ busted … and yes, Agnes was a voice actor.
BTW Ciku is no Dr. Phil … asking her for relationship advice is like asking a girl from Muranga who only knows how to make Pilau Njeri how to make Braised Pork.
Ha! Bet you didn’t see that coming … did ya?
cc Ed Note Post edited.Loved this dude js had to post it